The Tree, the Sapling, and the Hammock: Why Timing is Everything

Yesterday I wondered out loud in blog format:
Which version of me would people actually want in their lives?  The high-energy guy was easier to like, but the man I am now is a whole lot more capable of staying present. Younger me was built for attention; current me is built for connection.

After sharing some of these thoughts, a friend reached out with a perspective that really made me think. She said: "God changes the tune in our life every once in a while... Knowledge and wisdom change our perceptions of ourselves, and yes, we can grow new branches, but aren’t we the same tree? I owe so much to the foundation I created years ago."

I love that image of the tree. It forced me to look at my "younger self" with a little more grace. I wouldn’t trade my roots for anything, even the seasons where they were shallow and still finding their way. Those roots are the reason I'm standing today.  I also think growth changes the tree's purpose. Same roots, sure—but not the same reach. Not the same capacity to be there for someone else.

If I’m honest, younger me had the energy, but I’m not sure he had the depth to be someone you can actually lean on? That takes time. Think about it: Nobody ties a hammock to a sapling. You don’t look for shelter under a twig, and you don’t pitch a tent against something that hasn’t weathered a few storms. That kind of comfort—the kind where people can actually rest, trust, and stay a while—only comes from roots that have gone deep and a trunk that has thickened through the seasons. Boy, has my trunk thickened over the years!

Maybe some people were in our lives when we were still saplings, and that’s exactly what they were meant for—they helped us grow. Maybe others come along later, when we finally have a little more shade to offer than just a "good time."

I know I am not as quick as I once was. I might not be as "impressive" at first glance as the guy who used to command the room.  I’d like to think I’m something better now. I’m more intentional. More real. Maybe life doesn’t just bring people into our paths randomly. It may bring them back around when we finally have the capacity to meet them properly. If given the choice, I’d rather be the tree someone can build a friendship under than just a face they remember meeting once. I’m finally the version of myself that’s worth getting to know. And for the first time, I think I have enough shade for everyone.

What about you? Do you miss your "sapling" days, or are you finally enjoying the shade of the person you’ve become?