The Ex4mined L1fe

Some songs and movies don’t just entertain—they linger. They stir something profound inside, calling us to revisit the past and wonder   what might have been . Cher’s   If I Could Turn Back Time   is more than a power ballad—it’s a longing for a second chance. Darius Rucker’s   This   reminds us that every twist and turn, even the painful ones, lead us to where we’re meant to be. Garth Brooks’   Unanswered Prayers   gently teaches that sometimes, not getting what we want is the greatest gift of all. And in   The Family Man , Nicolas Cage’s character wakes up in a life he could’ve had—if only he’d made one different choice. Then there’s  The Best of Times , a lesser-known gem starring Robin Williams and Kurt Russell. It’s about reliving a high school football game that went wrong—and the chance to rewrite history. It’s funny, heartfelt, and deeply human. Like many of us, the characters are haunted by a single moment they wish they could redo. ...

After four decades in education, I’d like to think I’ve heard it all. Very little shocks me anymore—especially when it comes from the mouths of babes. But every now and then, someone drops a zinger that stops me in my tracks and leaves me with that classic deer-in-the-headlights look. Let’s rewind to my high school and college years. I was gregarious, loved sports, was a good teammate, a loyal friend, and always up for a good time. But when it came to dating, I had zero confidence. Maybe it was poor body image. Perhaps I was waiting for a growth spurt that never came. I topped out at a towering 5’4¾”. I was often drawn to women much taller than me—let’s just say, not exactly matches made in heaven. Still, my personality kept me in the game. In college, I fell head over heels for a beautiful young woman from Mission, Texas. She still holds a piece of my heart. The first time I saw her walk into a room, it was like a movie—everything else faded except her. This happened for weeks unt...

I once worked for a young priest—let’s call him Father 33-Buttons. He was part of a group of clergy who longed for the “glory days” before Vatican II. These men had a few colorful nicknames, but out of respect for the many dedicated priests I’ve worked with, I’ll stick with my favorite: the 33-button guys. They wore cassocks with 33 buttons, each one symbolizing a year that Christ walked the earth. Their spiritual style leaned traditional, and their unofficial leader was none other than the Darth Vader of sorts himself—Cardinal Raymond Burke. Father 33-Buttons made it clear from day one: he was the boss. Now, for those who don’t know me, I have a flair for the “funner” things in life. I wear novelty socks and cartoon characters, superhero ties, you name it. I carry a Scooby-Doo Mystery Machine lunchbox. I have a bobblehead collection nearing 100 pieces strong, and a shelf filled with religious artifacts, including a few playful ones, such as Pope bobbleheads and saint statues from ev...

It started with a nudge from my son Cody: “Dad, Facebook isn’t your vibe anymore. Go back to blogging.” He’s not wrong. Social media has become a sea of silent scrolling—thumbs up, heart emojis, maybe a fire symbol if you’re lucky. But real conversation? Rare. So here I am, dusting off the old blog spirit (RIP  An Examined Life , wherever you are) and diving back into long-form storytelling. Let’s see if we can still spark some dialogue, some reflection—and maybe even a few playlists. Here’s the context: I recently went cold turkey after 13+ years of online gaming with the same group of guys—Sheriff, Worms, Mopar, and me, the Insane G0@T. I chose my best friend (my wife) over Call of Duty. She was starting to feel like a gaming widow. Now, we sit next to each other, talk (yes, talk!), and binge-watch streaming series. So far, we’ve enjoyed  The Blacklist ,  Ted Lasso ,  Person of Interest ,  The 100 ,  Lucifer , and  Lost . We gave  Severance ...

  Each fall, I remind our school leaders, teachers, and especially our 8th graders that we hold them to high expectations. For our soon-to-be graduates, the sand in the hourglass is slipping quickly. Their time with us is short—what will they do with it before they leave for high school? I began my remarks this year with the phrase: “Your time has arrived.” The Greeks had two words for time: Chronos and Kairos . Chronos is measured time—minutes, hours, days, months, years. Kairos is “God’s time”—the right time, sacred time, a moment of opportunity. As leaders in our school, our students live in both. The question is: will they seize the opportunities before them, or will they let them pass by? This moment will never come again. Will they seize the day—or sleepwalk through the year? Time, of course, has always captured our imagination. Jim Croce wished he could save it in a bottle. Cyndi Lauper sang about “Time After Time.” The Rolling Stones insisted tha...

In today’s Gospel, Jesus is criticized by the scribes and Pharisees:  "This man welcomes sinners and eats with them." My father, a Baptist preacher, used to say,  “The Good Lord didn’t come down to spend time with the salt of the earth—He came to be with us sinners so we could be saved.”  That message rings true in today’s reading. Jesus responds to the criticism with three parables about lost things—a sheep, a coin, and a son. Each story teaches us something powerful about repentance and the joy of returning to God. In the first two parables, the lost sheep and coin are actively searched for. The shepherd leaves 99 sheep to find the missing one. The woman turns her house upside down to recover a single coin. But in the third parable—the story of the prodigal son—the father doesn’t go searching. He lets his son go, giving him the freedom to choose. And when the son returns, the father runs to him, embraces him, and celebrates his return. The older brother, much like the P...

Today’s Gospel reading from Matthew 5:13–16 might sound familiar:  “You are the salt of the earth… You are the light of the world.” These words always bring a smile to my face. They remind me of the musical  Godspell , based on the Gospel of Matthew. In one scene, the cast sings joyfully while cleaning up a barge, performing acts of kindness. Two lines stick with me: “If the salt has lost its flavor, then it ain’t got much to savor!” “If you put your light under a bushel, then you’ve lost something that’s crucial!” Salt and light—two simple things with powerful meaning. In biblical times, salt was incredibly valuable. It preserved food and was even used as currency. Roman soldiers were sometimes paid in salt, and poor performance might earn the phrase,  “You’re not worth your salt.”  Today, salt still enhances flavor—and so can we. We’re called to bring the flavor of God’s love into the lives of others. As Paul McCartney sang,  “Take a sad song and make it bette...

In today’s Gospel, we hear a familiar story: "As Jesus walked by the Sea of Galilee, He saw two brothers—Simon (called Peter) and Andrew—casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. He said to them, 'Come, follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.' And they left their nets at once and followed Him." As a parent, this moment fills me with awe. Peter, Andrew, James, and John didn’t hesitate. They didn’t say, “Just a minute,” or “Let me finish this first.” They simply dropped everything and followed Jesus. That kind of immediate trust and surrender is inspiring—but also challenging. Honestly, if Jesus asked me today to leave my school, my wife, my children, and my grandchildren to follow Him, I’m not sure I’d have the strength to say yes. But maybe this story isn’t just about physically walking away. Perhaps it’s symbolic? So let’s simplify the “ask.”   What are the nets I need to drop to follow Jesus more fully? What attachments, habits, or distractions kee...

One of my dear friends, Mary Regan, often closes her emails with this beautiful greeting. It’s a word many of us recognize, but only a few truly understand.  Namaste  is more than a salutation—it’s a gesture of reverence. With hands placed near the heart, fingers pointing outward and thumbs inward, we bow and say  namaste , acknowledging the presence of the Creator in both the one we greet and in ourselves. This greeting resonates deeply with today’s Gospel reading—the Presentation of Jesus in the Temple. Mary and Joseph, faithful to the Law of Moses, brought their newborn son to the temple to be consecrated to the Lord, offering a humble sacrifice of two doves or pigeons. While in the temple, a righteous man named Simeon took the infant Jesus into his arms and immediately recognized Him as the long-awaited Messiah. He praised God, saying he could now die in peace, having seen salvation with his own eyes. Also present was Anna, an 84-year-old widow who had devoted her lif...

"Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them... I am not speaking of all of you; I know whom I have chosen... Very truly, I tell you, whoever receives one whom I send receives me; and whoever receives me receives him who sent me."   —  John 13:16, 18, 20 This week’s Gospel readings have carried a consistent theme: Jesus reminding His followers—again and again—that to know Him is to know the Father. Yesterday, He was firm with Philip, who pleaded,  “Just show us the Father.”  Jesus responded with clarity and conviction:  “If you know me, you know the Father.” Today’s reading takes us back to the Last Supper. Interestingly, there’s no mention of the breaking of bread or sharing of the cup. Instead, we witness Jesus washing the feet of His disciples—a powerful act of humility and service. Here, Jesus institutes the concept of  Servant Leadership . I first encountered this idea n...

  We may all be familiar with today’s Gospel reading from Luke.  The angel Gabriel greets a young girl with the familiar phrase, Hail Mary, full of Grace.  In the following few exchanges, Gabriel explains God’s plan to change the world through her as the conduit.  After some back and forth, Mary said, "Here I am, the servant of the Lord; let it be done to me according to your word." As familiar as this reading may be, have you ever tried to put yourself in Mary’s place?  Could this encounter be duplicated in today’s world?  Would we surrender ourselves unconditionally to God’s will as Mary did?  I have had numerous conversations with myself on this very point.  It is safe to say, it would take some kind of miracle for me to have been the mother of our Lord and Savior!  I also reflect on the shock value that must have been presented to Mary.  She was not older than one of our junior high students at the time of the Annunciation. What...

"For I tell you, if your uprightness does not surpass that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never get into the kingdom of Heaven."  —Matthew 5:20 This Gospel reading challenges us to go beyond surface-level righteousness. Jesus often confronted the self-proclaimed holiness of the scribes and Pharisees—those who were more concerned with following rules than with loving God and sharing His love with others. The righteousness Jesus calls us to is deeper. It’s about loving God with all our heart, mind, spirit, and strength—and loving our neighbor as ourselves. I often ask myself:  Do I love others with that same spirit?  Would my friends and family say I do? What about the students, parents, and staff at St. Stephen Protomartyr School and Parish? Do I see Christ in the strangers I meet throughout the day? In those asking for help at intersections and on city streets? Especially in these challenging times, we are called to uphold peace, love, and justice in all we do. Ev...

"The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy, he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field."  —Matthew 13:44 At first glance, I’ll admit—I found the man’s actions a bit questionable. It seemed sneaky to discover someone else’s treasure, hide it, and then buy the field to claim it for himself. But context matters. In biblical times, there were no banks, ATMs, or safe deposit boxes. People often buried their valuables on their property for safekeeping. So, I’ll give the man a “kitchen pass” on this one! The deeper question is: What kind of treasure is so valuable that someone would sell everything they own to obtain it? I have two interpretations that speak to me most deeply: 1. Everlasting Life Jesus often told the wealthy that to inherit eternal life, they must give up everything and follow Him. This parable echoes that same message. The kingdom of heaven is worth more than all our earthly possessions...

Today’s reading reached deep into my heart and stirred something profound. Moses used to take a tent and pitch it outside the camp some distance away, calling it the “tent of meeting.” Whenever Moses went out to the tent, all the people rose and stood at the entrances to their tents, watching Moses until he entered the tent. As Moses went into the tent, the pillar of cloud would come down and stay at the entrance, while the LORD spoke with Moses. Whenever the people saw the pillar of cloud standing at the entrance to the tent, they all stood and worshiped, each at the entrance to their tent -  Exodus 33:7–10 This passage resonated deeply with me because I recently experienced a moment that felt strikingly similar. Exactly one month ago, our 1½- and 3½-year-old grandchildren were baptized at St. Stephen Protomartyr by Fr. Ron. It was a moment my wife and I had prayed for since the day they were born. But it wasn’t something we could force or guilt our son and daughter-in-law into—it...

  Becoming a father is easy. Being a  good  father? That’s the real challenge. Beyond being a provider, protector, and playmate, a father’s role is a delicate balance: strong yet gentle, decisive yet fair, a friend—but still the one in charge. In the “old days,” fathers paid the bills and handed out punishment. Today, fatherhood is a blend of discipline and love. The best dads lead by example, showing their children how to live through the choices they make every day. Modern fatherhood means tagging along on adventures, joining in the fun, and being present. And really, that’s not so hard—hidden inside every dad is a child waiting to play. It’s practically a rule that kids end up with every toy their dad ever wanted! To their children, fathers are a mix of Superman and Santa Claus. Dad can climb the highest mountain, swim the deepest sea, fly the fastest plane, and defeat the strongest monster. He can build a castle and be the king—though Mom, the queen, still makes him t...

In the Gospel of John, Jesus asks Simon Peter a deeply personal question: "Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?" Peter replies, "Yes, Lord; you know that I love you." Jesus responds, "Feed my lambs." This exchange repeats three times, echoing the three times Peter denied Jesus after His arrest. At first glance, Jesus is gently guiding Peter toward reconciliation, offering him a chance to reaffirm his love and loyalty. Peter’s final response— "Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you" —is raw and honest. And Jesus, in turn, says, "Feed my sheep." In that moment, Peter must have realized something profound: Jesus had forgiven him. Not only that—He was entrusting Peter with a mission. Despite Peter’s failings, Jesus was elevating him, reaffirming his role as the rock upon which the Church would be built. It’s a powerful testament to the transformative power of love and grace in our relationships. Whenever...